There are few multiplayer games quite like Dead by Daylight. Four Survivors. One Killer. One horrifying map. A handful of generators standing between the Survivors and freedom… and an entire community seemingly ready to argue over whether everyone else is playing the game wrong.

In theory, Dead by Daylight is a simple asymmetrical horror game. Survivors work together to repair generators, avoid the Killer, rescue one another, and escape. The Killer hunts them down, sacrifices them to the Entity, and does everything possible to stop that escape. Should be straightforward enough, but any DbD player will tell you that there are a bundle of unwritten rules that will make you a real-life monster if you manage to break them, even accidentally.

The toxicity surrounding Dead by Daylight is fascinating because it isn’t confined to just one side. Survivors complain about tunneling, camping, slugging, hard-core gen rushing, flashlight saves, looping, and coordinated SWF groups. Killers complain about bullying, teabagging, flashlight clicking, pallet stunning, excessive looping, obnoxious emotes, and Survivors turning the endgame into a victory lap. And somewhere in the middle is a player (me) who just wanted to play a spooky game after a shitty day at work. Womp womp, I reckon.

The interesting thing is that many of these complaints aren’t necessarily about mechanics but the intent. A Killer who repeatedly hooks the same Survivor might be playing strategically. To that Survivor, however, it can feel personal. A Survivor who crouches repeatedly at the exit gate might simply be celebrating with friends. To the Killer, it can feel like deliberate humiliation.

One of the biggest problems with Dead by Daylight is that many perfectly legitimate strategies can feel downright antagonistic when you’re on the receiving end. Take tunneling, for example. I’m a Killer main, so from the Killer’s perspective, eliminating one Survivor early can be an extremely effective strategy. Four Survivors repairing generators is a massive threat. Removing one means fewer people to repair, rescue, distract, and heal. From the Survivor’s perspective? You just spent half the match being constantly chased by the Killer while watching your teammates work on generators. It’s super easy to stop thinking, “damn, good strategy,” to “damn, this is annoying and not fun at all.” And that’s totally valid.

Let’s Uno Reverse and talk about Looping. A Survivor who spends an entire match looping a Killer around pallets may be playing brilliantly. They’re wasting the Killer’s time and allowing their teammates to complete objectives. But after the seventh pallet stun, the Killer may no longer be thinking about the match strategically. They’re probably going “I’m going to remember this Leon’s name.”

Few things have become more culturally recognizable in Dead by Daylight than the humble crouch. Crouching once? Normal, whatever. Crouching repeatedly at the Killer? War has been declared. Teabagging has become one of the game’s most recognizable forms of player-to-player communication. A Survivor may use it to say hello, celebrate a successful loop, signal that they want the Killer to chase them, or, let’s be honest, sometimes simply annoy the Killer. And Killers have their own equivalent forms of communication. Standing over a downed Survivor, repeatedly hitting a hooked Survivor, refusing to leave the area, and even carrying a Survivor toward the exit before turning around.

None of these actions necessarily violate the rules. But they can communicate something much more powerful: “I want you to know that I’m doing this specifically to you.”

There is something wonderfully ironic about a game centered around an extradimensional entity feeding on human emotion. Because sometimes the Entity barely needs to do anything. The players are generating plenty of negative emotion themselves.

This game absolutely thrives on tension. That’s part of what makes it so compelling! The healthiest way to play Dead by Daylight may be remembering that the person on the other side of the screen isn’t the villain from your match.

Well, what do you think? Are you a Survivor or Killer main, and what toxic behaviors have you experienced (or used?) Tell us all about it in the comments below and share this article on your socials to keep the convo going!